• Economist Test Prep
    Free Trial & Practice Exam
    BEAT THE GMAT EXCLUSIVE

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    Economist Test Prep
  • PrepScholar GMAT
    5 Day FREE Trial
    Study Smarter, Not Harder

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    PrepScholar GMAT
  • Varsity Tutors
    Award-winning private GMAT tutoring
    Register now and save up to $200

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    Varsity Tutors
  • Veritas Prep
    Free Veritas GMAT Class
    Experience Lesson 1 Live Free

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    Veritas Prep
  • EMPOWERgmat Slider
    1 Hour Free
    BEAT THE GMAT EXCLUSIVE

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    EMPOWERgmat Slider
  • Kaplan Test Prep
    Free Practice Test & Review
    How would you score if you took the GMAT

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    Kaplan Test Prep
  • Magoosh
    Magoosh
    Study with Magoosh GMAT prep

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    Magoosh
  • examPAL
    Most awarded test prep in the world
    Now free for 30 days

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    examPAL
  • e-gmat Exclusive Offer
    Get 300+ Practice Questions
    25 Video lessons and 6 Webinars for FREE

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    e-gmat Exclusive Offer
  • Target Test Prep
    5-Day Free Trial
    5-day free, full-access trial TTP Quant

    Available with Beat the GMAT members only code

    MORE DETAILS
    Target Test Prep

This is my first analysis of argument essay, please grade it

This topic has 0 member replies
satishkhatri5 Junior | Next Rank: 30 Posts Default Avatar
Joined
16 Dec 2007
Posted:
20 messages

This is my first analysis of argument essay, please grade it

Post Thu Dec 27, 2007 9:42 pm
Dear Friends,
This is my first essay. Please evaluate it and tell me areas of improvement. I don't mind even if you give me 0 out of 6 .
Thanks,
Satish

Argument

The following appeared as part of an annual report sent to stockholders by Olympic Foods, a processor of frozen
foods:
"Over time, the costs of processing go down because as organizations learn how to do things better, they become
more efficient. In color film processing, for example, the cost of a 3-by-5-inch print fell from 50 cents for five-day
service in 1970 to 20 cents for one-day service in 1984. The same principle applies to the processing of food. And
since Olympic Foods will soon celebrate its 25th birthday, we can expect that our long experience will enable us to
minimize costs and thus maximize profits."
Discuss how well reasoned . . . etc.

Essay

"The conclusion in the report sent to stakeholders that experiance will enable the company to minimize costs is not supported by sufficient evidence. There are no facts mentioned to support the conclusion.

The report fails to mention statistics suggesting higher efficiency with more experiance. Specific information such as what was the efficiency and cost in the begining, what is the efficiency and cost now is missing. Without this information stakeholeders will not be able to compare the change in efficiency.

Report mentioned example of photo prinitng, but it failed to relate this example to Olympic food processing. In case of photo printing, there can be more factors leading to cost reduction than years of experiance. It could be introduction of new technology or availability of cheap paper. Report applied the 'same principle' to both buisnesses, however it do not say which pricnciple. Also the price reduction in case of photo prinitng was in 14 years but what happened with price of Olympics foods 14 years of experiance is not mentioned. So it is not wise to draw conlcusion on the basis of photo printing example.


Though organizations perform better with experiance but there are more than one factors that decide the cost and profit. Some such factors are labor cost, machinery cost, inflation rate etc. If maximization of profit with experiance is true for every buisness then there will never be losses and shutdowns. Thus the conclusion would have been convincing if supportted by some statistics."

  • +1 Upvote Post
  • Quote
  • Flag

Best Conversation Starters

1 lheiannie07 108 topics
2 ardz24 67 topics
3 Roland2rule 63 topics
4 LUANDATO 52 topics
5 Vincen 51 topics
See More Top Beat The GMAT Members...

Most Active Experts

1 image description GMATGuruNY

The Princeton Review Teacher

150 posts
2 image description Jeff@TargetTestPrep

Target Test Prep

114 posts
3 image description Rich.C@EMPOWERgma...

EMPOWERgmat

105 posts
4 image description Scott@TargetTestPrep

Target Test Prep

101 posts
5 image description Max@Math Revolution

Math Revolution

85 posts
See More Top Beat The GMAT Experts