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Please rate my Issue essay

Expert replies

Please rate my essay!

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Total votes: 1

by albatross86 » Mon Jun 14, 2010 9:49 am
I would really appreciate it if someone could spare a few minutes to rate my essay and leave feedback. Thanks!

ESSAY QUESTION:

"Employees should expect no privacy while on the job, even when engaging in personal communication via telephone or e-mail. Employers are paying for their employees' time and have a reasonable expectation that this time is spent solely on work-related activities."

Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the position stated above. Support your views with reasons and examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.


YOUR RESPONSE:

The issue at hand is that of employee privacy during work-hours. The statement suggests that employers can justify a complete absence of privacy by pointing out that since employees are being paid for their time, it is reasonable to expect that they are not misusing their time. I would like to express my own opinion on this issue, and elaborate on its ramifications.

Firstly, the statement that employees should expect no privacy at all is problematic. Privacy is a complex issue that has several ethical and legal undertones. A blanket rule such as this one is not a viable option as an employer's policy as it fails to account for several special scenarios. For example, if an employee should telephone his/her physician or personal lawyer during work-hours, he/she should be entitled to feeling assured that the conversation will have been confidential. Additionally, an employee should expect privacy in locations such as the washroom.

Secondly, it is also unreasonable to expect that an employee should be denied the prerogative to spend a small, justified amount of time in personal activities such as contacting his/her family or reading the news. In insisting that work-hours should be spent solely on work-related activities, employers are neglecting to acknowledge employees as human resources who must be treated with consideration. Employers who are considering productivity would do well to ascertain whether a blanket ban on personal activity would not actually decrease employee productivity. For example, recent studies show that employees who are allowed to access their personal email could be as much as 15-20% more productive than those who aren't. Thus, a well phrased privacy policy should account for all circumstances and allow for reasonable compromises.

It is important to note, however, that employees cannot expect the opposite - a guarantee of complete privacy. All official communications such as email and fax are justified in being recorded and monitored to protect the employer's interests. One such instance is that of intellectual property. For example, my former employer strictly monitored the movement of engineering drawings, to prevent them from getting into the hands of competitors. This justifies controlling the employer's internal networks and monitoring employee activity in them. Another instance is that of misuse of company assets. A former employee was terminated from the company when it was found that he was running illegal websites from his company computer.

Thus, while privacy is a complex issue which requires exhaustive examination and considerations, it is something that employees will have to compromise to an extent in order to ensure their employer's security and productivity.
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Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

by grockit_andrea » Sun Jun 20, 2010 2:32 pm
I like this essay; you've got a good sense of structure, language, and tone. There were a few grammar or usage errors, but not enough to be distracting. Two things I might change, though: first, your introductory paragraph should clearly state not only that you are going to address the issue, as yours did, but also what your position is. Clearly state whether you agree or disagree with the author. Second, stronger examples would make this essay more impressive. Your first two body paragraphs use a hypothetical scenario and an unattributed study to support your points; providing real examples would be better. Citing the source of the study you mention or discussing an actual company that has addressed the issue at hand would help.
Overall, your writing is good; some small tweaks to your content will help you get the score you're working toward.
Andrea A.
Grockit Tutor
https://www.grockit.com
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by albatross86 » Mon Jun 21, 2010 10:52 am
Thank you Andrea, I'll keep your advice in mind!
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