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PLEASE RATE MY FIRST ISSUE ESSAY

Expert replies
by [email protected] » Wed May 02, 2012 5:42 am
ISSUE PROMPT:
"The primary responsibility of citizens is to obey their nation's civil and criminal laws."
Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the opinion stated above. Support your views with reasons and/or examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.

RESPONSE:

Some people may say that obeying their nation's civil and criminal laws is not necessary for every citizen; other may counter the view by saying that obeying the laws brings prosperity and unity in the society. I will rather support the later view keeping in mind that obeying the laws of the land of a country always leads to the cohesiveness among the citizen and prosperity.

The chief reason for my view is that obeying the laws of the land is the responsibility of every citizen, and every citizen should obey them. Obeying the laws leads to the safety and security of society as a whole. For example, In America, the citizens obey the laws with the sense of responsibility, and this gives them a sense of security at the work place or any other place they go. Another example is Pakistan, where people do not obey the laws of their land and the result is that the whole country is in the brink of division and in chaos.

Another reason for my view is obeying the laws brings the prosperity to the nation. For example, Countries like Australia, America etc. are prosperous and considered developed ones.This is because the prosperity of a nation and obeying the laws go hand in hand. The reason is that when citizens obey the laws, this automatically results in good working conditions, good governance, and better cohesion among people, this further leads to prosperity.

Some might argue that obeying the laws is not necessary, and everyone should have the choice to live with their own rules. This view is not good for any society because if everyone has the chance to live with their own rules, the society and the country as a whole would become chaos. For example, in the countries like Somalia, Afghanistan, and Pakistan among several other nations, the laws are just good for nothing, and this resulted in the chaos everywhere in those countries.

In sum, I concur that obeying the civil and criminal laws of a country leads to the prosperity, safety of its people, and a sense of cohesion among people. As a whole, obeying the laws is a moral responsibility of every citizen and this always leads to the good for a society and for a country.
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Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

by sbillbody » Thu May 03, 2012 6:07 pm
I quite liked it. 5

Said what it was going to argue.
Argued it.
Told me what it just argued.

I liked how you didn't think it was good enough to be right, but the contrary point was also fatally wrong.

Minor qualm: "For example, in the countries like Somalia, Afghanistan, and Pakistan among several other nations, the laws are just good for nothing, and this resulted in the chaos everywhere in those countries. "

This isn't stating anything new and this entire paragraph can be cut without the meaning of your essay being lost in the slightest. Bolster it up by saying something like: Citizens of somalia et. al. find themselves in a major predicament whereas their lawless behavior has both constrained any type of commerce within the county and has made foreign businesses weary to invest because of the bedlam caused by its criminal citizens.

Hope this helps,

s
"Sometimes Me Think, 'What is Friend?' and then me say, 'Friend is someone to share the last cookie with.'" -Cookie Monster
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