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Please rate my essay, I have GMAT in 10 days

Expert replies
by Limanac » Sun Dec 01, 2013 3:54 am
PROMPT:
"Studies suggest that an average coffee drinker's consumption of coffee increases with age, from age 10 through age 60. Even after age 60, coffee consumption remains high. The average cola drinker's consumption of cola, however, declines with increasing age. Both of these trends have remained stable for the past 40 years. Given that the number of older adults will significantly increase as the population ages over the next 20 years, it follows that the demand for coffee will increase and the demand for cola will decrease during this period. We should, therefore, consider transferring our investments from Cola Loca to Early Bird Coffee."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically sound.

Many people like to start their day with the hot coffee in the morning, and they tend to drink two more cups of coffee during the day. The cola drink is widely accepted beverage both for young and old people. In the preceding statement, the author claims that the consumption of coffee increases with the age of consumers, and on the other hand that the consumption of cola decreases with the age of consumers. Thought his claim may well have merit, the author presents a poorly reasoned argument, based on several questionable premises and assumptions, and based solely on the evidence the author offers; I can not accept his argument as valid.

The primary issue with the author's reasoning lies in his unsubstantiated premise. He claims that people drink more coffee and less cola with the increase of the age, but does not provide any empirical data or valid statistical numbers on the issue. Furthermore, the author claims that this trend remain the same in the last 40 years, but he does not present any data about the new drinking trends that have develop over these numbers of years. The cola drinks contain less sugar, and are more appealing even to the older consumers. On the other hand, the coffee without caffeine is gaining more popularity among young consumers. The author's premise, the basic for his argument lacks any legitimate evidentiary support and renders his conclusion unacceptable.

In addition, the author makes several assumptions that remain unproven. He assumes that consumers drink only coffee or cola, and does not mention any other hot beverages, for example tee, or any other soft drinks. Furthermore, there are no data about the consumption of beer or and other alcoholic drink for that matter. The author weakens his argument by making assumptions and falling to provide explication of the links between peoples' age and their drinking habits.

While the author does have several key issues in his arguments' premise and assumptions that is not to say that entire argument is without the base. He should include some statistical data about the consumers drinking habits and their age, and he needs to provide more data about the consumption of other drinks, both alcoholic and nonalcoholic types. Though there are several issues with the authors' reasoning at present, with more research and clarification, he could improve his argument significantly.

In sum, the author's illogical argument is based on unsupported premises and unsubstantiated assumptions that render his conclusion invalid. His statement presents his personal opinion that does not rely on any valid data or research. If the author truly hopes to change his renders' mind on this issue, he would have to largely restructure his argument, fix the flows in his logic, clearly explicit his assumptions, and provide evidentiary support. Without these things, his poorly reasoned argument will likely convince just few people.
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Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

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