MGMAT SC & modifiers: can someone analyze this sentence?

This topic has expert replies
Master | Next Rank: 500 Posts
Posts: 125
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 9:49 pm
Thanked: 2 times
In the problem set for Chapter Six in MGMAT SC, problem #4 requires that the following by correct:

4. Angola, which was ravaged by civil war for many years after it gained independence from Portugal, which is now one of Africa's success stories, has an economy that grew by 21% last year, where parliamentary elections are to be held later this week.

My correction of the sentence is the following, and according to MGMAT SC, it is incorrect (my modifications in are in bold):

Angola, which was ravaged by civil war for many years after it gained independence from Portugal and where parliamentary elections are to be held later this week, is now one of Africa’s success stories, as it has an economy that grew by 21% last year.

Can somebody please analyze my sentence and tell me if it is really incorrect?

I'm thinking maybe my use of "...and where..." after "Portugal" and before "parliamentary" is ungrammatical. I'm not sure.

Thanks!
Source: — Sentence Correction |

• Page 1 of 1