GMAT Essays (AWA)

Would like to receive feedback on my another attempt of Arguement Analysis.

ESSAY QUESTION:
The following appeared in the editorial section of a national news magazine:

"The rating system for electronic games is similar to the movie rating system in that it provides consumers with a quick reference so that they can determine if the subject matter and contents are appropriate. This electronic game rating system is not working because it is self regulated and the fines for violating the rating system are nominal. As a result an independent body should oversee the game industry and companies that knowingly violate the rating system should be prohibited from releasing a game for two years."

My Essay:
The rating system for electronic games and movies are of similar type but companies that create these electronic games are violating the rating system hence the gaming industry should be regulated by an independent body. The author suggests as a consequential measure that those violating the games rating should be prohibited from releasing the games for two years. However the author's arguements are short of convincing based on the reasons put forward in the next paragraphs.

First and the foremost arugement pressent by the author is comparing electronic games rating to be similar to movie rating. In my opinion though both these media are electronic in nature they differ in terms of interaction between the audience or the user and the media. Movies are one way interaction on the other hand electronic games are two way interaction. Hence comparing the ratings systems between these two media's would be unfair approach.

Second arugement put forward by the author is that the gaming industry is self regulated and fines are nominal. Yes as compared the the movie industry which has an glorious history of more than half century, electronic gaming industry is barely two decades old. In addition, the number of users of electronic games are far far less as compared to the number of movie goers. Based on these two facts I believe that it is but natural for the electronic gaming industry fines to be nominal. As the electronic gaming industry matures and the user base grows the regulations and rules will change. It would be grossly incorrect to enforce regulations on a budding industry based on the experiences of an already mature industry of a different nature.

The last arguement presented by the author is a ban of two years for companies that violate the rating of the games developed. THere is no data provided by the author to suggest that the two year ban is justifiable and would be a strong deterrent against the rating violation.

To summarize the arguements presented by the author lack from compelling reasons backed by statistics. To strengthen the violations of the electronic games rating, my suggestion would be to do an analysis about the consumer base of these games, categorize the different types of electronic games available and understand the adverse affects of those games on the consumer. It may be possible that a completely new rating system is required for the electronic gaming industry that caters to its needs as opposed to implementing it similar to the movies rating system.