AWA essay rating ---Could anyone please rate my essay?

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The argument concluding that sale of red meat and fatty cheeses makes the store's business lucrative is flawed. The argument lacks adequate statistical representation. The argument contains lack of evidence and conveys a distorted view of the situation.

The first argument stating that the people were concerned about regulating their intake of meat and fatty cheeses is flawed. Not only the argument fails to give us the correct estimation of the people based on which one can conclude this fact,but also it is based on poor reasoning. The example of the organic store which started selling cheese is inadequate to make a claim about the conclusion. There may be significant number of factors which may lead the store to take this decision. The store might have decided to include the chain for the diary products as well along with the organic fruits and vegetables to attract more customers.But this does not mean the sales for the organic fruits and vegetables has deteoriated. So making a claim solely on the reason for introducing cheese products into its retail range does not sound convincing at all.

The second argument in which the editor compares the revenue of owners of two restaurants-- The Good Earth Cafe and The House of Beef is again a cheap claim to prove that the people are less concerned about regulation of their intake. The revenue generated in the restaurant depends on many factors ranging from customer satisfaction to the quality of the food. There might be scenario where the people may be more interested for the vegetarian food but due to poor quality of food and service provided in the Good Earth Cafe, the people were bound to go the nearby restaurant,The House of Beef ,thus increasing the revenue for the later. Apart from that, the services provided in the House of Beef would be way more better than the services compared with those provided in the Good Earth Cafe.One may even point it to a demographic factor,for example the place where these two restaurants were located might contain people in which the number of people who eat non vegetarian food may be more than the number of people who prefer vegetarian food. In this way the revenue generated in the Good Earth Cafe may be lowered.

After a closer examination of the presented article,it is apparent that the article holds several logical flaws and inadequate statistical data to reason its claim.The recommendation in the essay above suggests which factors to take into consideration before adequately concluding about the intake of meat and cheese.