Hi. Please rate my AWA analysis of an Argument essay. This topic is a sample from Kaplan GMAT Premier 2011. This is where I'm starting AWA practice.
Topic:
The following appeared in a memo from the regional manager of Luxe Spa, a chain of high-end salons.
"Over 75% of households in Parksboro have Jacuzzi bathtubs. In addition, the average family income in Parksboro is 50% higher than the average, and a local store reports record-high sales of the most costly brands of hair and body care products. With so much being spent on personal care, Parksboro will a profitable location for a new Luxe Spa - a salon that offers premium services at prices that are above average."
Response:
The writer concludes that opening a spa that offers high-price services in a neighborhood where a majority of the people have Jacuzzis at home and where expensive personal-care products sell a lot is a good idea. However, there are certain assumptions that the writer makes while stating the above conclusion.
First, the writer assumes that Parksboro residents' high expenditure on personal care items would translate into a high expenditure on personal care services. Essentially, the writer makes no distinction between goods and services. It is possible that the residents purchase expensive personal-care products and install jacuzzis at home more to obtain status-symbols that to actually care for their appearance. If that is the case, then opening a spa in the neighborhood might not be a profitable venture.
The writer also does not estimate the paying-capability of the residents. Since premium services imply an expenditure on premium goods on the part of the service-provider, the prices for such services will have to be higher than the cost of the goods in order to make a profit. If the price for such services is too much for the average Parksboro resident, the business might not be profitable.
Also, the report of "record-high sales" of costly brands by just a single store seems vague. The store provides no indication of when the record-high sales occured. Perhaps they occured only during holiday season, when the sales of most goods are higher. If this is the case, the business might fail in off-peak seasons.
Before making a decision, the owners of the business should evaluate whether Parksboro residents are interested more in personal appearance or in purchasing luxury-items. Also, the owners should try to figure out whether the neighborhood's residents would be willing to pay the premium prices that the spa intends to charge for its services. Finally, investigating whether premium personal-care brands sell in large quantities all the time or just occasionally would allow the business-owners to gauge whether their venture can last throughout the year. Only if the owners find the answers to these questions satisfactory and in accord with their business-plan, they might consider opening the spa in the neighborhood.
Topic:
The following appeared in a memo from the regional manager of Luxe Spa, a chain of high-end salons.
"Over 75% of households in Parksboro have Jacuzzi bathtubs. In addition, the average family income in Parksboro is 50% higher than the average, and a local store reports record-high sales of the most costly brands of hair and body care products. With so much being spent on personal care, Parksboro will a profitable location for a new Luxe Spa - a salon that offers premium services at prices that are above average."
Response:
The writer concludes that opening a spa that offers high-price services in a neighborhood where a majority of the people have Jacuzzis at home and where expensive personal-care products sell a lot is a good idea. However, there are certain assumptions that the writer makes while stating the above conclusion.
First, the writer assumes that Parksboro residents' high expenditure on personal care items would translate into a high expenditure on personal care services. Essentially, the writer makes no distinction between goods and services. It is possible that the residents purchase expensive personal-care products and install jacuzzis at home more to obtain status-symbols that to actually care for their appearance. If that is the case, then opening a spa in the neighborhood might not be a profitable venture.
The writer also does not estimate the paying-capability of the residents. Since premium services imply an expenditure on premium goods on the part of the service-provider, the prices for such services will have to be higher than the cost of the goods in order to make a profit. If the price for such services is too much for the average Parksboro resident, the business might not be profitable.
Also, the report of "record-high sales" of costly brands by just a single store seems vague. The store provides no indication of when the record-high sales occured. Perhaps they occured only during holiday season, when the sales of most goods are higher. If this is the case, the business might fail in off-peak seasons.
Before making a decision, the owners of the business should evaluate whether Parksboro residents are interested more in personal appearance or in purchasing luxury-items. Also, the owners should try to figure out whether the neighborhood's residents would be willing to pay the premium prices that the spa intends to charge for its services. Finally, investigating whether premium personal-care brands sell in large quantities all the time or just occasionally would allow the business-owners to gauge whether their venture can last throughout the year. Only if the owners find the answers to these questions satisfactory and in accord with their business-plan, they might consider opening the spa in the neighborhood.
