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Mercy Otis

by metallicafan » Wed Jul 17, 2013 2:27 pm
Because she knew many of the leaders of colonial America and the American Revolution personally, Mercy Otis Warren was continually at or near the center of political events from 1765 to 1789, a vantage point combining with her talent for writing to make her one of the most valuable historians of the ear
(a) a vantage point combining with her talent for writing to make
(b) a vantage point, when combined with her talent for writing, that made
(c) a vantage point that combined with her talent for writing, and it made
(d) and this vantage point, which combined with her talent for writing to make
(e) and this vantage point, combined with her talent for writing, made

OA is __E._

Choice E creates a new clause. With the conjunction "and", this choice separates the idea of the first clause from the idea related with the vantage point. Is there a change in meaning in comparison with A? In other words, if I use a new clause instead of a modifier (just as choice A did), does the
meaning of the senctence change? If it changes the meaning, why E is right? The meaning in E is not the intended logical meaning expresed in the original sentence. :s
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Source: — Sentence Correction |

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by [email protected] » Sun Jul 21, 2013 8:37 pm
Hi metallicafan,

A Sentence Correction with lots of commas usually means that you'll be dealing with either parallelism or modification rules. In this case, it's modification.

The first two parts of the sentence talk about Mercy Otis Warren, the last part talks about a vantage point. Since MOW is a person and not a vantage point, the original sentence is not grammatically correct. The sentence needs the extra words "and this vantage point," to separate the 2 clauses/ideas.

The correct answer now has 2 parts that talk about MOW (with proper modification) and 3 parts that talk about "this vantage point" (also with proper modification).

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by hemant_rajput » Tue Jul 23, 2013 6:58 am
the underlined portion is an appositive modifier describing the time from 1765 to 1789.

In option A "combining with" make the sentence meaning very vague. Vantage point is not combining(getting mixed) with her writing but along with or in addition to her writing skills made her popular.

(b) a vantage point, when combined with her talent for writing, that made - when and that are both modifying phrases which is completely wrong.
when is expecting something to happen;however putting the that after when modifier make the sentence run on.

(c) a vantage point that combined with her talent for writing, and it made - it has no clear referrent
(d) and this vantage point, which combined with her talent for writing to make - this is not even a sentence. this vantage point is supposed to do something but using a non-restrictive clause we left the sentence hanging there only.
(e) and this vantage point, combined with her talent for writing, made - correct.

Hope this helps.
I'm no expert, just trying to work on my skills. If I've made any mistakes please bear with me.
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by Matt@VeritasPrep » Tue Jul 23, 2013 5:36 pm
As Hemant notes, the issue here is one of modification. When you use a noun to describe another noun, you generally want that describing noun to immediately follow the noun that is being described.

For example:

"Tom graduated from the Preston School of Industry, an institution little known outside of California."

Here "an institution ..." is a noun phrase describing another noun, "the Preston School of Industry". This is a GMAT-approved use of a noun modifier (or "appositive phrase", if we're being formal).

In our sentence however, we have

"1765 to 1789, a vantage point ..."

1789 is NOT the vantage point we are describing, so this modifier is incorrect, and answers A, B, and C are all out.

As Hemant also notes, D is out because "this vantage point, which combined with her talent to make ..." is an incomplete clause, or fragment: "this vantage point" is a subject that doesn't take a verb ("which combined ..." is one long modifier).
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