Hi,
I gave MGMAT today and got a 710 score. I am all set to give GMAT this thursday.
The last thing I want from this beautiful forum, which has boosted by score, is to evaluate my below Essay and any improvement that can be done.
ESSAY QUESTION:
The following appeared in a science magazine:
"The "Space Race" of the 1960's between the USA and Russia was very expensive but it yielded a tremendous number of technological advances. These advances have provided many economic and humanitarian benefits. The benefits have more than paid for the effort and money spent during the Space Race and therefore the government should make allowances within the budget to pay for a manned Mars landing by 2020."
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically sound.
YOUR RESPONSE:
The author of a science magazine article contends that Making allowance within budget to pay for manned Mars landing by 2020 will lead to many economic and humanitarian benefits as in past Space Race. The author fails to convince because of few unwarranted assumptions. He assumes that Benefit of Manned Landing by 2020 and investing money in such project will lead to positive results,which might not be required, as in past. He also assumes that Space Race benefits were results of a cold war and results might be too exagerated due to heavy competition. Above all, the decisions taken in past scenario is no guarantee that they will have same intented results in the current one because the current scenario may demand different investments.
Benefis of Manned Landing by 2020 may vary from the benefits of the earlier space research. For eg. earlier space research has enabled the technology of artificial satellite and have proved to be very useful since then. However the manned mission to Mars might not bring something new because the Enthalpy, area of research, differs. The study in Mars Enthalpy will lead to inventions that simply might not work in Earth's and hence will lead to waste of economic resources.
The author believes in fact that earlier space Race was only responsible for the number of technological advances. The Space race was for few years, however such inventions require centuries of study. Moreover, it can't be ruled out that Space Race has bought the results exagarrated and has bought the technological advances to be disclosed.
In the current scneario, the technological advances are mainly required in areas of genetic Engineering, or fighting Nature. Study in Mars, will not lead to benefits that current scenario demands. A wise decision is always made on examining the current requiremint and its benefits, and not on the past.
The author should have highlighted the spefic details of technological advances that will yiled the beneifts in Manned Mars Landing. He could also have highlighted the current scenario is same as the ealrier one.
In summary, the conclusion to invent money in Manned space mission is not accurate and requires in depth resaerch before accepting the one.
I gave MGMAT today and got a 710 score. I am all set to give GMAT this thursday.
The last thing I want from this beautiful forum, which has boosted by score, is to evaluate my below Essay and any improvement that can be done.
ESSAY QUESTION:
The following appeared in a science magazine:
"The "Space Race" of the 1960's between the USA and Russia was very expensive but it yielded a tremendous number of technological advances. These advances have provided many economic and humanitarian benefits. The benefits have more than paid for the effort and money spent during the Space Race and therefore the government should make allowances within the budget to pay for a manned Mars landing by 2020."
Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically sound.
YOUR RESPONSE:
The author of a science magazine article contends that Making allowance within budget to pay for manned Mars landing by 2020 will lead to many economic and humanitarian benefits as in past Space Race. The author fails to convince because of few unwarranted assumptions. He assumes that Benefit of Manned Landing by 2020 and investing money in such project will lead to positive results,which might not be required, as in past. He also assumes that Space Race benefits were results of a cold war and results might be too exagerated due to heavy competition. Above all, the decisions taken in past scenario is no guarantee that they will have same intented results in the current one because the current scenario may demand different investments.
Benefis of Manned Landing by 2020 may vary from the benefits of the earlier space research. For eg. earlier space research has enabled the technology of artificial satellite and have proved to be very useful since then. However the manned mission to Mars might not bring something new because the Enthalpy, area of research, differs. The study in Mars Enthalpy will lead to inventions that simply might not work in Earth's and hence will lead to waste of economic resources.
The author believes in fact that earlier space Race was only responsible for the number of technological advances. The Space race was for few years, however such inventions require centuries of study. Moreover, it can't be ruled out that Space Race has bought the results exagarrated and has bought the technological advances to be disclosed.
In the current scneario, the technological advances are mainly required in areas of genetic Engineering, or fighting Nature. Study in Mars, will not lead to benefits that current scenario demands. A wise decision is always made on examining the current requiremint and its benefits, and not on the past.
The author should have highlighted the spefic details of technological advances that will yiled the beneifts in Manned Mars Landing. He could also have highlighted the current scenario is same as the ealrier one.
In summary, the conclusion to invent money in Manned space mission is not accurate and requires in depth resaerch before accepting the one.
Sonu
--------
When you want something desperately, the whole Universe conspires in helping to give it to you - The Alchemist
--------
When you want something desperately, the whole Universe conspires in helping to give it to you - The Alchemist
