Is this sentence correct?

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reply2spg: Legendary Member; Posts: 1261; Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2008 3:46 am; Thanked: 27 times; GMAT Score:570

by reply2spg » Sat Jul 10, 2010 8:58 am

I see lots of problems in the sentence below.

The family of the child who died in Kanpur earlier this month has blamed the Prime Minister's security for causing delays that they believed were fatal.

1. 'Who' is modifying to The Family and not to Boy
2. 'who died in Kanpur earlier this month' should be in commas
3. Word 'They' didn't has proper antecedent
4. Please let me know 'that' is referring to what?

Please help me with my analysis.

Source of this sentence is ndtv.com

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Source: Beat The GMAT — Sentence Correction | Sat Jul 10, 2010 8:58 am

hardik.jadeja: Legendary Member; Posts: 535; Joined: Fri Jun 08, 2007 2:12 amFollowed by: 5 members; Thanked: 87 times; GMAT Score:730

by hardik.jadeja » Sat Jul 10, 2010 9:36 am

reply2spg wrote:I see lots of problems in the sentence below.

The family of the child who died in Kanpur earlier this month has blamed the Prime Minister's security for causing delays that they believed were fatal.

1. 'Who' is modifying to The Family and not to Boy
2. 'who died in Kanpur earlier this month' should be in commas

It is correct as written. The pronoun WHO correctly refers to the child. Usually(Not always) modifiers placed within two commas are nonessential, but here the modifier who died in Kanpur earlier this month is an essential information to identify the child we are talking about, so we do not need comma.

reply2spg wrote: 3. Word 'They' didn't has proper antecedent

I see only one noun (the family) that pronoun THEY could refer to. There is no other plural noun in the sentence.

reply2spg wrote: 4. Please let me know 'that' is referring to what?

THAT is used to introduce a modifier(they believed were fatal) that is used to narrow the identity of the modified noun(delay) and cannot logically be removed.

Hope that helps..

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reply2spg: Legendary Member; Posts: 1261; Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2008 3:46 am; Thanked: 27 times; GMAT Score:570

by reply2spg » Sat Jul 10, 2010 10:20 am

Thanks Hardik, I agree with you on all points, except on point 3. I am not agree because family is collective noun and 'they' is plural pronoun. I think orally it is fine to say 'they' to family, but in written English and in GMAT land it is not correct. I hope you agree with me.

hardik.jadeja wrote:
reply2spg wrote:I see lots of problems in the sentence below.

The family of the child who died in Kanpur earlier this month has blamed the Prime Minister's security for causing delays that they believed were fatal.

1. 'Who' is modifying to The Family and not to Boy
2. 'who died in Kanpur earlier this month' should be in commas
It is correct as written. The pronoun WHO correctly refers to the child. Usually(Not always) modifiers placed within two commas are nonessential, but here the modifier who died in Kanpur earlier this month is an essential information to identify the child we are talking about, so we do not need comma.

reply2spg wrote: 3. Word 'They' didn't has proper antecedent
I see only one noun (the family) that pronoun THEY could refer to. There is no other plural noun in the sentence.

reply2spg wrote: 4. Please let me know 'that' is referring to what?
THAT is used to introduce a modifier(they believed were fatal) that is used to narrow the identity of the modified noun(delay) and cannot logically be removed.

Hope that helps..

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hardik.jadeja: Legendary Member; Posts: 535; Joined: Fri Jun 08, 2007 2:12 amFollowed by: 5 members; Thanked: 87 times; GMAT Score:730

by hardik.jadeja » Sat Jul 10, 2010 10:42 am

On GMAT, collective noun are usually singular, but not always. Collective noun can be considered plural when you want to emphasize the individuals actors, not their unity.

Coming to the sentence, British English considers many collective nouns plural, so NDTV.com is right in its own way.

Remember, GMAT grammar rules and the grammar rules people usually follow in their day to day life are little different. So you will come across many sentences in newspapers, in books, on the internet that will be considered wrong as per GMAT rules but they are considered right by many.

Hope that helps..

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reply2spg: Legendary Member; Posts: 1261; Joined: Sun Sep 14, 2008 3:46 am; Thanked: 27 times; GMAT Score:570

by reply2spg » Sat Jul 10, 2010 10:56 am

Thanks for your time and help, yes this helps

hardik.jadeja wrote:On GMAT, collective noun are usually singular, but not always. Collective noun can be considered plural when you want to emphasize the individuals actors, not their unity.

Coming to the sentence, British English considers many collective nouns plural, so NDTV.com is right in its own way.

Remember, GMAT grammar rules and the grammar rules people usually follow in their day to day life are little different. So you will come across many sentences in newspapers, in books, on the internet that will be considered wrong as per GMAT rules but they are considered right by many.

Hope that helps..

Like this post

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