Plz rate my 2nd essay (GMAT in 2 days)

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Plz rate my 2nd essay (GMAT in 2 days)

by nikhita gera » Fri Aug 17, 2012 9:02 am
"The recent surge in violence in the southern part of the city is a result of a shortage of police officers and an absence of leadership on the part of the city council. In order to rectify the burgeoning growth of crime that threatens the community, the city council must address this issue seriously. Instead of spending time on peripheral issues such as education quality, community vitality, and job opportunity, the city council must realize that the crime issue is serious and double the police force, even if this action requires budget cuts from other city programs."




In the argument given above, the author says that a shortage of police officers and an absence of leadership on the part of the city council have led to a recent surge in violence in the southern part of the city. He further suggests that city council must take this issue seriously and spend more time and money to address this issue instead of other less serious and peripheral issues. But the argument is not convincing logically as it is based on questionable assumptions and omits out some important concerns.
The argument is based on the premise that a shortage of police officers and an absence of leadership on the part of the city council are the reasons behind the suge in violence in the city. The author doesn't quote any evidence to justify this statement. There can be other reasons for increase in violence, for example, communal riots.In such a case, we cant blame the police or the city council . Since the author mentions that the surge in violence is a recent happening, there is a question in the readers' mind whether the number of police officers has reduced recently. That question is left unanswered as there is no data in the argument related to the number of police officials.
The author suggests that the police force should be doubled. But there is a possibility that the police force is not being utilized to its maximum potential.The author has missed this consideration . The author should have included efficient utilization of the force in the suggestive measures.
The argument says that the council should not spend time on peripheral issues such as education quality, community vitality, and job opportunity . Though the crime issue is a serious one, the council needn't neglect the other issues .The council is responsible for these issues as well By managing its time and resources properly, it can deal with all these issues.
In a nutshell it can be said that the argument is not well reasoned because of the above mentioned flaws. Had the author substantiated his statements with evidences, it would have been a better argument.
Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

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by Jim@StratusPrep » Sun Aug 26, 2012 8:23 am
Sorry we missed this. How did the exam go?
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