Below is the question and the answer I wrote. Please rate my essay or write a review.
q>
"To reverse the deterioration of the postal service, the government should raise the price of postage stamps. This
solution will no doubt prove effective, since the price increase will generate larger revenues and will also reduce the
volume of mail, thereby eliminating the strain on the existing system and contributing to improved morale."
A>
The author's argument that the government should raise the price of postage stamps to reverse the deterioration of the
postal services draws a very strong conclusion from the given premises and is clearly flawed. The argument assumes that an
increase in the price of postage stamps will do more good than harm to the postal services and that it will not have the
opposite effect. Furthermore, it assumes that the current volume of mail is putting a strain on the existing system and
that it is something that needs to be improved. The author also failed to mention whose morale needed improving, the
employees or the owners of the postal companies.
First, the assumption that low price is one of the contributing factors to the deterioration of the postal system is not
clearly supported by the argument. Thus a step to increase the price to address that issue would not guarantee an
effective solution. What if increasing the price actually reverses the intended effect of increase in revenue? People who
currently do use postal services may stop buying postage stamps due to higher prices. This will lead to lower revenue and
not help the postal companies.
Second, an increase in price of stamps may reduce the volume of mail but nowhere in the argument does it say that the
current volume is putting a strain on the existing system. May be the reverse is true, that is, the postal system is
losing it's charm due to more and more people using digital ways of communication and what the postal companies need is to
attract more customers to increase the volume of the mail to help support the existing system.
Third, the author fails to mention whose morale is the effort trying to improve. Is it the morale of the owners of the
postal companies that needs to be improved or the morale of the employees?
The above argument could be strengthened by stating some actual reasons as to why the postal system is deteriorating
rather than just proposing a solution. The author could also make the argument more logically sound by using less strong
words to convey the effects of the solution and by providing more information on the strains that the existing system has.
As it stands, however, the above argument is flawed.
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Any feedback will be greatly appreciated.
Thanks,
Adi
q>
"To reverse the deterioration of the postal service, the government should raise the price of postage stamps. This
solution will no doubt prove effective, since the price increase will generate larger revenues and will also reduce the
volume of mail, thereby eliminating the strain on the existing system and contributing to improved morale."
A>
The author's argument that the government should raise the price of postage stamps to reverse the deterioration of the
postal services draws a very strong conclusion from the given premises and is clearly flawed. The argument assumes that an
increase in the price of postage stamps will do more good than harm to the postal services and that it will not have the
opposite effect. Furthermore, it assumes that the current volume of mail is putting a strain on the existing system and
that it is something that needs to be improved. The author also failed to mention whose morale needed improving, the
employees or the owners of the postal companies.
First, the assumption that low price is one of the contributing factors to the deterioration of the postal system is not
clearly supported by the argument. Thus a step to increase the price to address that issue would not guarantee an
effective solution. What if increasing the price actually reverses the intended effect of increase in revenue? People who
currently do use postal services may stop buying postage stamps due to higher prices. This will lead to lower revenue and
not help the postal companies.
Second, an increase in price of stamps may reduce the volume of mail but nowhere in the argument does it say that the
current volume is putting a strain on the existing system. May be the reverse is true, that is, the postal system is
losing it's charm due to more and more people using digital ways of communication and what the postal companies need is to
attract more customers to increase the volume of the mail to help support the existing system.
Third, the author fails to mention whose morale is the effort trying to improve. Is it the morale of the owners of the
postal companies that needs to be improved or the morale of the employees?
The above argument could be strengthened by stating some actual reasons as to why the postal system is deteriorating
rather than just proposing a solution. The author could also make the argument more logically sound by using less strong
words to convey the effects of the solution and by providing more information on the strains that the existing system has.
As it stands, however, the above argument is flawed.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Any feedback will be greatly appreciated.
Thanks,
Adi
