Please review the AWA and provide the feedback

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The following appeared as part of an editorial in a campus newspaper:

"With an increasing demand for highly skilled workers, this nation will soon face a serious labor shortage. New positions in technical and professional occupations are increasing rapidly, while at the same time the total labor force is growing slowly. Moreover, the government is proposing to cut funds for aid to education in the near future."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. In your discussion, be sure to analyze the line of reasoning and the use of evidence in the argument. For example, you may need to consider what questionable assumptions underlie the thinking and what alternative explanations or counterexamples might weaken the conclusion. You can also discuss what sort of evidence would strengthen or refute the argument, what changes in the argument would make it more logically sound, and what, if anything, would help you better evaluate its conclusion. (used with permission from mba.com)


The author concludes that the nation will soon face a serious labor shortage due to various factors as it has an increasing demand for highly skilled workers, significant gap between demand and supply of labor and the scenario will likely worsen as the government is proposing to cut funds for aid to education in the near future. The argument has some flaws in its assumptions as indicated below.

Primarily, the author says that as the demand for highly skilled workers increases i.e., as we need more number of high skilled workers, the nation will soon face a serious labor shortage. This need not be true as we may find ways by training or educating the experienced existing labor to suffice the demand for skilled labor. And even the nation can employ the skilled people from other nations to satisfy the requirements. People from almost all over the world generally migrate to USA for different jobs and never has a scenario arisen where the country like USA face labor shortage. There is no further info from the editor why he felt serious labor shortage will arise from demand for skilled labor.

Moreover, the editor asserts that even though total labor force is growing slowly, need for positions in technical and professional occupations is increasing rapidly. Here the editor has assumed that increase in labor force will not be sufficient to fill the new technical and professional positions required. There is no reason to assume in such manner as situation can be otherwise as well. existing labor may possess skills at handling multiple jobs at work and thus the nation may not face labor shortage.

In addition, the government is proposing to cut funds for aid to education in the near future. This can deteriorate the situation as reducing the aid to education may force the people who cannot afford the education to either migrate the country or shift to other non-technical or non professional jobs. But it is also possible that the nation is filled with wealthy section of people who can well afford their education or there are enough number of private NGO's which can help the people get educated or skillful at work.

While we cannot completely deny the author's conclusion, we also need additional information as discussed above nation to form any conclusion. Whether the nation will soon face a serious labor shortage or not depends on various factors and without the needed information, the argument as is completely baseless.
Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

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by AdamTooch » Sun Nov 22, 2015 8:17 pm
Overall your writing is well organized and presents sound critiques. I'm just another person trying to beat this test but here is my analysis of your analysis.

*The author concludes that the nation will soon face a serious labor shortage due to various factors as it has an increasing demand for highly skilled workers, significant gap between demand and supply of labor and the scenario will likely worsen as the government is proposing to cut funds for aid to education in the near future.*

This may be grammatically correct but it is long and hard to read. You could stop at "labor shortage" and continue the list as as separate sentence. Be wary of "due to," I find it rarely is the correct phrase. Reference this Magoosh link https://magoosh.com/gmat/2013/gmat-idiom ... nsequence/

Your use of i.e. in the second paragraph is repetitive and could be removed if you use only one of the phrases. Here are some other things I noticed. Things in BOLD should be deleted and replaced with underlined word.

Primarily, the author says that as the demand for highly skilled workers increases i.e., as we need more number of high skilled workers, the nation will soon face a serious labor shortage. This need not be true as we may find ways by of training or educating the experienced existing labor to suffice meet the demand for skilled labor. And (remove)even if the nation can employ the skilled people from other nations to satisfy the requirements (fragment, combine with next sentence). People from almost all over the world (remove) generally migrate to the USA for different jobs and a scenario has never arisen where the country like the USA faces a labor shortage. There is no further info (don't shorten information) from the editor why he felt a serious labor shortage will arise from demand for skilled labor.

There are similar errors in missing or incorrect articles in several other paragraphs as well. Also I didn't notice anything that attempted to strengthen the author's argument as the tests instructions direct. I'm sorry, I had to cut this analysis short, I think your analysis of the argument is valid but your missing parts of speech need work and your sentence structure needs refining.

I hope that helps you out. Hopefully some others will chime in.

Adam

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