Please rate my issue essay

This topic has expert replies
Junior | Next Rank: 30 Posts
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon May 31, 2010 6:44 pm

Please rate my issue essay

by vivekmalhotra » Sat Jul 10, 2010 3:46 pm
Successful individuals typically set their next goal somewhat - but not too much - above their last achievement. In this way, they steadily raise their level of aspiration."
In your opinion, how accurate is this statement? Explain, using specific reasons and examples from your reading, your own experience, or your observation of others.


------------------------------------
My Response
------------------------------------

Success is often considered relative and each individual thinks and defines success in his or her own relative way. But one aspect that is common in all the successful individuals is their desire to get more from what they have already achieved. This passion to achieve more keeps on motivating the individuals to perform better in their respective area of work. The individual who gauges his or her task periodically and compares it with the previous tasks is always successful and is considered highly by his family and colleagues.

This approach of setting the next goal above the last achievement drives the individuals to constantly improve in what they do. If an individual does not have this drive for constant improvement, he will start feeling stagnancy in his work. That is the reason that the goals are defined in almost every aspect of the life so individuals can gauge their performance against the goals and can thrive for constant improvement.

In schools and universities, the top students are always appraised by scholarships and other benefits. The top students have better chances to land in promising jobs and do better in their career. Such benefits often drive students to achieve better goals than their last achievements so they can be successful in getting what they aspire for.

In another example, almost all the companies appraise their employees in the yearly appraisal which gauges the achievements of the employees. Such appraisals are required to motivate the employees to perform better that how they performed at their last appraisal. The companies through these appraisals often set goals for the employees and rate them on basis of how successful the employee was in achieving his or her goal. The successful employees are often benefited by pay hikes, better perks and promotion. The companies where such process is not followed, employees often complaint about the stagnancy in their work and lack of motivation.

Lastly I would like to give an example of Mahatma Gandhi, who became as successful as to receive the title of "Father of the Nation" of the largest democratic country of the world. Gandhi followed the same mantra to achieve higher goal than his previous achievement. In his autobiography, Experiments with the truth, he has mentioned how he was always motivated to achieve better results. Due to his constant thrive to achieve more, he ultimately persuaded the British rulers to grant independence to India.

To conclude, I would say that it is always important to keep higher goals and trying to achieve them. This will make you a better person and you will be successful in whatever you try to achieve.
Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

GMAT Instructor
Posts: 357
Joined: Wed Aug 12, 2009 8:31 pm
Thanked: 128 times
Followed by:7 members

by grockit_andrea » Sat Jul 10, 2010 4:44 pm
I think this would probably get a 3 or a 4. Your general organization is good-- you have clear intro and conclusion paragraphs, and each body paragraph does have a clear topic. But your topic sentences could be stronger; they don't seem to summarize your point for the paragraph as much as they provide the background for it. Along the same lines, the lack of transition words in the early body paragraphs gives the essay a disjointed feel. Finally, your use of Gandhi as an example in the last body paragraph is good; the rest of your essay would be stronger if you used similarly specific examples to support your previous points.
Keep practicing, and good luck with your continued efforts!
Andrea A.
Grockit Tutor
https://www.grockit.com

Junior | Next Rank: 30 Posts
Posts: 13
Joined: Mon May 31, 2010 6:44 pm

by vivekmalhotra » Sun Jul 11, 2010 9:34 am
Thanks a lot Andrea. I will keep the points in my mind. Can you please have a look at my latest attempt:

https://www.beatthegmat.com/please-rate- ... 61299.html

I tried to work on some of the take aways from your reply. Thanks!!

• Page 1 of 1