I have my GMAT in 2 weeks and this is the first essay I have written. I would really appreciate an honest feedback so that I know which areas I need to look into while writing the essay.
Analysis of an Arguement:
The following was used as part of an internet advertising company's appeal to businesses: "Furniture Depot employed our internet advertising company to help. Since then its sales increased by 10% over last year's totals. Furniture Depot's success demonstrates how using our internet services can increase your profitability."
The argument above is full of flaws and overlooks certain basics that should have been taken into consideration while arriving at the conclusion. According to the arguement by the internet advertising company, the sales of Furniture Depot has increased by 10% only because Furniture Depot has used its services. It doesnt take any other factors into account that could have led to an increase in sales. The internet advertising company goes on to imply that any company that uses its servies will increase its profitability.
First of all the argument only provides the example of Furniture Depot. It doesnt mention any other clients who have benefited from advertising on their website. It is difficult to judge the effectiveness of advertising on the internet company's website based on just one client.
Maybe Furniture Depot has seen an increase in their sales over the last few years, even when they were not using the services of the internet advertising company. It could also be possible that the increase in their sales numbers 2 years back when they werent using the internet advertising company was 20% and last year it has infact gone down to an increase of 10%. If this were the case, the advertising hasnt helped Furniture Depot at all.
It could also be possible that this internet advertising company was one of many companies whose services Furniture Depot had utilised for advertising their products. If this were the case, it negates the internet advertising company's claim that because of their services, the sales of Furniture Deport has increased by 10%. It could be the net effect of using various mediums of advertising.
Because of the above mentioned reasons, I believe that the argument is flawed. To strengthen its claim, the internet advertising company should have published a list of its clientele who have benefited from advertising on its website. It should also have provided a detailed analysis of how using its services had resulted in an increase in sales of its clients.
Analysis of an Arguement:
The following was used as part of an internet advertising company's appeal to businesses: "Furniture Depot employed our internet advertising company to help. Since then its sales increased by 10% over last year's totals. Furniture Depot's success demonstrates how using our internet services can increase your profitability."
The argument above is full of flaws and overlooks certain basics that should have been taken into consideration while arriving at the conclusion. According to the arguement by the internet advertising company, the sales of Furniture Depot has increased by 10% only because Furniture Depot has used its services. It doesnt take any other factors into account that could have led to an increase in sales. The internet advertising company goes on to imply that any company that uses its servies will increase its profitability.
First of all the argument only provides the example of Furniture Depot. It doesnt mention any other clients who have benefited from advertising on their website. It is difficult to judge the effectiveness of advertising on the internet company's website based on just one client.
Maybe Furniture Depot has seen an increase in their sales over the last few years, even when they were not using the services of the internet advertising company. It could also be possible that the increase in their sales numbers 2 years back when they werent using the internet advertising company was 20% and last year it has infact gone down to an increase of 10%. If this were the case, the advertising hasnt helped Furniture Depot at all.
It could also be possible that this internet advertising company was one of many companies whose services Furniture Depot had utilised for advertising their products. If this were the case, it negates the internet advertising company's claim that because of their services, the sales of Furniture Deport has increased by 10%. It could be the net effect of using various mediums of advertising.
Because of the above mentioned reasons, I believe that the argument is flawed. To strengthen its claim, the internet advertising company should have published a list of its clientele who have benefited from advertising on its website. It should also have provided a detailed analysis of how using its services had resulted in an increase in sales of its clients.
