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Anybody want to rate my Issue Analyis AWA.

Expert replies
by jonahramu » Tue Feb 17, 2009 8:36 pm
I'm generally terrible at writing quickly. So, my AWA attempts have been mostly frustratingly incomplete in the allotted 30 minutes. This is my first that I completed in the 30 minutes, an Issue analysis. Ran out of time on the proofread, but thought I'd submit for any feedback? Also, I quote studies from memory, but am a little hazy on whether I have the University they were done at (or the year) correct. Does this matter? Feedback appreciated.

Stimulus (from Kaplan course): "Some people believe that second-language fluency is crucial to individual development and international accord, and so they maintain that language training should begin very early. Others feel that second-language fluency is not necessary to most Americans, and that elementary school should be devoted to basic skills."

Essay:
Children should be instructed in a second language, beginning at a very young age. The jobs and opportunities of the future will be increasingly global in nature, and facility with at least one foreign language will be a valuable asset to every citizen. Linguistic studies have told us for some time that early childhood is the easiest and most effective time to assimilate languages. Given this widely accepted fact and the multiple benefits of a second language, which will be discussed in the following paragraphs, we would be well advised to institute the teaching of second languages in elementary schools nationwide.

The first compelling benefit of a second language is to the cognitive development of the individual. Opponents of elementary-school second language education will assert that students would be diverted from more important basic skills, like reading and mathematics. However, studies carried out in the 1990’s by researchers at Brown and Harvard Universities demonstrated that bilingual children developed greater verbal and general cognitive abilities than monolingual children as they grew older. All evidence suggests that children who learn a second language will benefit from collateral improvements in reading, writing and other basic skills.

A second clear benefit of second language education comes at a national and international level. By exposing all citizens to foreign languages and cultures, we will increase international understanding, and reduce the potential for future wars. I imagine that the level of conflict the United States has had with countries in the Middle East might have been significantly reduced if a greater proportion of our foreign service and military personnel, as well as politicians, were fluent in the language and culture of the region. While opponents of second language education might assert that most citizens will not need to use their second language skills, people from all walks of life have the potential to impact our international relations.

Finally, as alluded to in my introduction, our citizens and nation would certainly benefit from a multilingual and globally savvy workforce. The jobs of tomorrow will demand greater and greater levels of international communication. Opponents of elementary school second language programs will point to deficiencies in the basic skills of our workforce, and claim that focus should remain exclusively on the “three R’s.” However, as mentioned earlier, second language acquisition promotes greater skills in other areas. Finally, the skills of tomorrow’s workplace will be all about communication, and proficiency in foreign cultures and languages will be key to success.
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Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

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