Please rate my essay

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Please rate my essay

by ajit2k13 » Sun Aug 25, 2013 10:14 am
The following appeared in a newspaper editorial during the holiday shopping season:

"Americans spend far too much of their time buying and consuming non-essential goods. Studies show that, on average Americans spend over a quarter of their leisure time shopping. As such, it is no secret why America is losing its competitive edge relative to other countries. Instead of spending their time productively, Americans are wasting time through frivolous consumption. In order to counteract this trend, Americans should spend more time focused on personal and communal development--by, for example, pursuing educational advancement or participating in volunteer opportunities."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically sound.

1. The author's assertion that by reducing the leisure time and spending it fruitfully in personal and communal development, the Americans will assist America in retaining its competitive edge in the world is riddled with some questionable assumptions and the argument is not at all convincing. The various questionable assumptions like reducing leisure time, focused personal and communal development, educational enhancement and voluntary service reduce the argument unsound.
2. Firstly, the reduction of leisure may not actually translate into increase in production and consequently enhanced competitive edge, since people need time to relax and come out of the daily rigmarole of work hours and live a stress free life, which eventually will lead to higher production and competitive edge.
3. Secondly, the spending time productively and enhancing educational and communal development may not fructify into what author is referring to, because the educational courses or the communal development programme undertaken may not be the one directly benefiting their service profile or the industry in which they work.
4. The author does not present any evidence in support of his claim regarding loss of competitive edge like reduction in GDP, increase in unemployment rates, reductions in exports or increase in imports etc. The author also does not give evidence to substantiate his claim that how the fruitful spending of time has improved situation in other states or countries.
5. In sum, the argument is flawed and unconvincing and author would do well if the evidence is provided in terms of previous studies of data points that has helped countries in retaining their competitive edge by focused personal and communal development
Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

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