Rate the argument “The inflow of immigrant workers into ou

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Rate my argument essay

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100%
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Total votes: 2

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Rate my argument writing... !

ESSAY QUESTION:
The following appeared in the editorial section of a local newspaper:

"The inflow of immigrant workers into our community has put a downward pressure on wages. In fact, the average compensation of unskilled labor in our city has declined by nearly 10% over the past 5 years. Therefore, to protect our local economy, it is essential to impose a moratorium on further immigration."

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically sound.

MY RESPONSE:
The argument states that the inflow of immigrant workers into the community has put a downward pressure on wages. Therefore, to protect the local economy, it is essential to impose a moratorium on further immigration. Stated in this way, the argument fails to mention several key factors based on which it could be evaluated. The conclusion of the argument relies on the assumptions for which there are no clear evidences. Hence, the argument is unconvincing and has several flaws.

First, the argument believes that the inflow of immigrant workers into the community has put a downward pressure on the wages. This statement is a stretch and not substantiated in any ways. The author fails to give objective evidences about the size of economy, number of immigrants entering, unemployment rate, skilled workforce availability, reduction in the wages of unskilled and skilled labor. The author's premises, the basis for his argument lack any legitimate evidentiary support and render his conclusion unacceptable.

Second, the argument claims that the average compensation of unskilled labor in the city has declined by nearly 10% over the past 5 years. While, the argument fails to give the evidence about the rise and fall of average compensation of skilled labor in the city. Furthermore, there is no information provided about the population of the city whether it is declining or not. Clearly, the data provided is really not sufficient to jump to the conclusion that only the rise in immigration has caused the downgrade in the average compensation of unskilled labor. Furthermore, the author weakens his argument by making assumptions and failing to provide clear explication of the links between protection of local economy and imposition of moratorium on further immigration.

Finally, while author has several issues in his argument's premises and assumptions that is not to say that entire argument is without base. The author could have strengthened his arguments by providing data about the current global economy and its influence on the country and city. Further, author could have elicit his idea by providing an example of country, which protected itself by taking measures against key factors for the economy revival rather than just immigration problem.

In sum, the author's argument is based on the unsupported premises and unsubstantiated assumptions that render his conclusion invalid. If author truly hopes to change the readers' minds on the issue, he would have to large restructure his argument, fix the flaws in his logic, clearly explicate his assumptions, and provide evidentiary support. Without these things, his poorly reasoned argument will likely to convince few people.
Source: — GMAT Essays (AWA) |

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by sharon7756 » Sat Jul 14, 2012 4:36 pm
I gave your essay a 5. I think overall its very well thought out and organized. There are a couple mistakes with articles like "the". There are several places where you used a "the" that didn't need to be there, and some places where a "the" was needed.

The first paragraph about the weak evidence is very well written. You did a great job! The second paragraph about the weak evidence is a little difficult to read. I think a large portion of that is because all of the sentences are of similar lengths and syntax. I would suggest some variance.

The last two paragraphs have great evidence, and I think with a little editing could have been more understandable.

You clearly understand how to evaluate an argument and support your conclusions. (Which isn't easy for a lot of people) I would suggest working on sentence structure a little bit more and grammar concepts.

I hope this helps!

-Sharon

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