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jennysbelly
- Junior | Next Rank: 30 Posts
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Tue Aug 18, 2009 5:52 am
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Hi there,
I'm taking the GMAT 11/2 and I took an Ultimate Practice Test through Kaplan yesterday. I'm very disappointed with my score but I wanted some feedbacks on the essays.
Here is my argument essay:
The following appeared in the editorial section of a Bedford Falls newspaper.
" A recent nationwide study of high schools reveals that the percentage of students who graduate on time is higher for private schools than for public schools. For this reason, Bedford Falls parents who want their children to graduate from high school on time should send their children to private schools. "
Deciding between public and private school can be a difficult decision for parents who have that option. They must take into consideration the cost of the schooling, the educational quality, and the social interests of their children. In Bedford Falls, according to the author, parents must also consider the time it takes their children to graduate. Because the percentage of students who graduate on time is greater for private school students than those in public school, the author believes parents should spend for private school. However, this claim cannot be substantiated by the evidence given without relying on several assumptions, there for we cannot accept it as true.
The author assumes that attending private school is the lone reason why these students graduate in a more timely matter than others. However, there are numerous other reasons why students in private school may graduate in less time that are not related to private school attendance. First, the very fact that the parents of private school students took care in placing their students in a school (as opposed to blindly enrolling them in public school) suggests a certain degree of interest in their children's schooling. Those parents might very well extend this interest to a greater amount of support for these kids' education. Children with parents who encourage their doing their homework and doing well in school, tend to better in school, and our less likely to have the academic problems that would result in being held back for graduation.
Additionally, as the expense of private school is generally reserved for those who have the income to support it, private school students tend to be from wealthier family than some public school students. While there are cetainly exceptions to this, it holds to reason that the reason why some public school students may take longer to graduate might be that the student must work to help support himself or his family. It has been shown that students that work long hours outside of the school, tend to have trouble academically due to the difficulty in getting homework done in minimal time, and general exhaustion during the school day. If the reason why private school students graduate faster is due to more parental support and more time to focus on academic studies, than there is no need for parents to only send their children to private school; they may send their children to the school they wish and provide more emotional and financial support.
It is impossible to substantiate the argument above without truly understanding the demographic breakdown of the schools in Bedford Falls. The author speaks of percentages of students, but does not provide true numbers. If there are 1000 students in public schools and 20 in private schools, that weakens the argument considerably. The author has only stated that the percentage of those who graduate on time is higher in private school, but not how much higher? If the author were to have provided hard numbers, he might have been able to strengthen is argument. Withough hard evidence to support the assumptions that are the basis of this argument, we cannot say that Bedford Falls parents who want their children to graduate from high school on time should send their children to private schools.
Here is my issue Essay:
" Consumers need to be protected from companies that make deceptive claims in their advertising. However, companies should always be allowed to make truthful claims, even if those claims could be misunderstood by some consumers. " Discuss the extent to which you agree with the opinion expressed above. Support your point of view with reasons and/or examples from you own experience, observations, or reading.
In today's society, we are bombarded with advertisements. On television, on billboards, on the internet browsers, it seems impossible to go even a single day without some company trying to sell to you. Due to this fact, advertising has increasingly become the major deciding factor in how and what the average consumer decides to purchase. This is why it is important to protect consumers from false advertising, and encourage business to include as many true facts about their products and services as possible.
For years, tobacco companies were able to advertise for cigarettes on televesion, billboards, and print magazines. Even well after the surgeon general required warnings on every box of cigarettes that they were detramental to our health, the tobacco companies continued to sell smoking as the habit of young, vital, and healthy people. The Marlboro Man, who was the image of masuculinity to generations of men, and the young vibrant women of Virginia Slims ads belied the future of lung cancer and emphazema that these corporations were actually selling to their customers. The introduction of "light" cigarettes perpetuated this lie, leading smokers to believe these cigarettes were less harmful. The courts have since ruled that these ads, just as the cigarettes, are indeed poisonous to consumers and we must apply this message to similar kinds of advertising.
In those years since the tobacco companies were shut out of advertising, a new kind of ad has filled our magazine pages: drug ads. Often times these ads even appear to be an article in the magazine, fooling the customer to believing they are getting objective information if the reader has not read the fine print reading "Adverising Section." While these ads have been a huge financial success for the pharmaceutical companies, they have not been good for consumers in general as they run to their doctors for prescriptions to cure Restless Leg Syndrome, and other diseases they never knew they had.
Similarly, the largest industry in the US right now, is diet and weight loss. Everyday a new product with "testimonials" showing dramatic weightloss comes on the market. Recently, it has been shown that many of the pictures of successful users of these products were falsley obtained. A company will pay a bodybuilder to gain 20 lbs, and use that as the before picture, and the athletes prior physique as the after. Thousands of consumers buy the products, even though these drugs are not FDA approved and many have to be removed from the market for safety concerns.
However, the responsiblity of improving advertising does not rest entirely on the marketers' shoulders. We as consumers must learn to tell the difference between an adverisement and an objective review. We must use common sense when deciding what products to buy and whether or not they fit our needs. We must be intelligent enough to know that no miracle product can make us lose 30 lbs in 3 days, nor remove stains without scrubbing. That being said, the marketers need to be responsible as well. The largest growing consumer segment is children. We cannot expect our children to be skeptics. While we as parents must attempt to control what children have access to, the internet age has made this increasingly difficult. Thus, we must insist that companies not maliciously market to children.
Thanks in advance!
I'm taking the GMAT 11/2 and I took an Ultimate Practice Test through Kaplan yesterday. I'm very disappointed with my score but I wanted some feedbacks on the essays.
Here is my argument essay:
The following appeared in the editorial section of a Bedford Falls newspaper.
" A recent nationwide study of high schools reveals that the percentage of students who graduate on time is higher for private schools than for public schools. For this reason, Bedford Falls parents who want their children to graduate from high school on time should send their children to private schools. "
Deciding between public and private school can be a difficult decision for parents who have that option. They must take into consideration the cost of the schooling, the educational quality, and the social interests of their children. In Bedford Falls, according to the author, parents must also consider the time it takes their children to graduate. Because the percentage of students who graduate on time is greater for private school students than those in public school, the author believes parents should spend for private school. However, this claim cannot be substantiated by the evidence given without relying on several assumptions, there for we cannot accept it as true.
The author assumes that attending private school is the lone reason why these students graduate in a more timely matter than others. However, there are numerous other reasons why students in private school may graduate in less time that are not related to private school attendance. First, the very fact that the parents of private school students took care in placing their students in a school (as opposed to blindly enrolling them in public school) suggests a certain degree of interest in their children's schooling. Those parents might very well extend this interest to a greater amount of support for these kids' education. Children with parents who encourage their doing their homework and doing well in school, tend to better in school, and our less likely to have the academic problems that would result in being held back for graduation.
Additionally, as the expense of private school is generally reserved for those who have the income to support it, private school students tend to be from wealthier family than some public school students. While there are cetainly exceptions to this, it holds to reason that the reason why some public school students may take longer to graduate might be that the student must work to help support himself or his family. It has been shown that students that work long hours outside of the school, tend to have trouble academically due to the difficulty in getting homework done in minimal time, and general exhaustion during the school day. If the reason why private school students graduate faster is due to more parental support and more time to focus on academic studies, than there is no need for parents to only send their children to private school; they may send their children to the school they wish and provide more emotional and financial support.
It is impossible to substantiate the argument above without truly understanding the demographic breakdown of the schools in Bedford Falls. The author speaks of percentages of students, but does not provide true numbers. If there are 1000 students in public schools and 20 in private schools, that weakens the argument considerably. The author has only stated that the percentage of those who graduate on time is higher in private school, but not how much higher? If the author were to have provided hard numbers, he might have been able to strengthen is argument. Withough hard evidence to support the assumptions that are the basis of this argument, we cannot say that Bedford Falls parents who want their children to graduate from high school on time should send their children to private schools.
Here is my issue Essay:
" Consumers need to be protected from companies that make deceptive claims in their advertising. However, companies should always be allowed to make truthful claims, even if those claims could be misunderstood by some consumers. " Discuss the extent to which you agree with the opinion expressed above. Support your point of view with reasons and/or examples from you own experience, observations, or reading.
In today's society, we are bombarded with advertisements. On television, on billboards, on the internet browsers, it seems impossible to go even a single day without some company trying to sell to you. Due to this fact, advertising has increasingly become the major deciding factor in how and what the average consumer decides to purchase. This is why it is important to protect consumers from false advertising, and encourage business to include as many true facts about their products and services as possible.
For years, tobacco companies were able to advertise for cigarettes on televesion, billboards, and print magazines. Even well after the surgeon general required warnings on every box of cigarettes that they were detramental to our health, the tobacco companies continued to sell smoking as the habit of young, vital, and healthy people. The Marlboro Man, who was the image of masuculinity to generations of men, and the young vibrant women of Virginia Slims ads belied the future of lung cancer and emphazema that these corporations were actually selling to their customers. The introduction of "light" cigarettes perpetuated this lie, leading smokers to believe these cigarettes were less harmful. The courts have since ruled that these ads, just as the cigarettes, are indeed poisonous to consumers and we must apply this message to similar kinds of advertising.
In those years since the tobacco companies were shut out of advertising, a new kind of ad has filled our magazine pages: drug ads. Often times these ads even appear to be an article in the magazine, fooling the customer to believing they are getting objective information if the reader has not read the fine print reading "Adverising Section." While these ads have been a huge financial success for the pharmaceutical companies, they have not been good for consumers in general as they run to their doctors for prescriptions to cure Restless Leg Syndrome, and other diseases they never knew they had.
Similarly, the largest industry in the US right now, is diet and weight loss. Everyday a new product with "testimonials" showing dramatic weightloss comes on the market. Recently, it has been shown that many of the pictures of successful users of these products were falsley obtained. A company will pay a bodybuilder to gain 20 lbs, and use that as the before picture, and the athletes prior physique as the after. Thousands of consumers buy the products, even though these drugs are not FDA approved and many have to be removed from the market for safety concerns.
However, the responsiblity of improving advertising does not rest entirely on the marketers' shoulders. We as consumers must learn to tell the difference between an adverisement and an objective review. We must use common sense when deciding what products to buy and whether or not they fit our needs. We must be intelligent enough to know that no miracle product can make us lose 30 lbs in 3 days, nor remove stains without scrubbing. That being said, the marketers need to be responsible as well. The largest growing consumer segment is children. We cannot expect our children to be skeptics. While we as parents must attempt to control what children have access to, the internet age has made this increasingly difficult. Thus, we must insist that companies not maliciously market to children.
Thanks in advance!
