The Application Process

Hi,

Would it be a bad idea to ask a high school student I mentored to write the peer review for me for Stanford and/or third recommendation for Harvard? Not thinking clearly at this point. I could also ask my co-mentor, but he's only been my co-mentor for a year.

Thanks!

I would assume that a peer would be a colleague that you worked with side-by-side on a project or some venture. I don't think a mentee would qualify unless you worked with him side-by-side in equal capacity.

Thanks for the response!

Do you think my co-mentor for the program would be suited? Unfortunately, my co-mentors changed in the two years so I have only known this guy for a year. I looked at some of the recommendation questions and not sure how he'll respond to stuff like "how did you work in a team" and "how did the applicant convince others to support an initiative" given that we didn't necessarily work on convincing others of anything....

I am at a loss for the peer review. Alternatively, I am thinking of asking a guy I've known for years (7 yrs!), a few years older than me, worked in a team with me my last year of high school and has known me since, and we've remained involved in the organization we were involved in but to a lesser extent, may be increased extent now. How do you view that?
e.g. I think he would be great EXCEPT that his "team experiences" with me probably came from last year of high school, which was 7 years ago....not sure if he can find a way to spin this to make this seem more recent (i.e. we've both remained advisors of this organization since, but obviously not very deeply involved).

For harvard, if they ask for 3 recs, do you suggest (given my concerns about the peer rec) that I just ask a third work recommendation?? Thoughts?

Thans again for any help.

dchen -

I agree with the previous post that you cannot use your mentee for a peer review. First of all, you two are not peers. As his/her mentor, you are in a position of authority, and it is impossible for him/her to be truly objective in an appraisal of you. Concerning your co-mentor, he also sounds less than ideal.

Without knowing about your career to date, I am a bit confused why you lack a good possible peer recommendation. If you are a lone entreprenuer, I have had clients use board members of their venture to write on there behalf. Additionally, I had a technical consultant ask his main client to write for him. Both were highly unusual cases, but it sounds as if yours might be as well.

For your HBS application, trust your instinct to go with a third professional recommender. Alternatively, is there anyone from college (professor, club member, etc.) that can speak to working with you in that capacity. It would be far preferable to a high school contact.

Good luck,
Jennifer

Jennifer,

Thanks so much for your response. I am pretty concerned about my peer recommendation. To give a little bit of background, I only graduated a few years ago and Stanford's peer definition is pretty specific - can't be subordinate or superior to me. However, the community service program I was involved in either had a team leader (who I guess technically is my superior) or my co-mentor.

Thinking more, I can think of several options (if you could let me know what you think, obviously understand this is all at face value, but I'm very conflicted):

For the Harvard 3rd rec (I already will have 2 work ones):
1. HBS professor who advised my thesis. This would be great except it has been 2 years since I've seen him and even during the year I was writing my thesis with him, we didn't see each other a TON. However, overall I think he has a good opinion of me and I imagine his word would matter a lot given he is faculty. HOWEVER, there is always the risk he'd end up giving a semi-good/lukewarm recommendation which would hurt me even more because he is faculty! (of course, I could mitigate this by feeling out if he will do this)
OR
2. Another work one. I realize this doesn't show much of a diversity...but I am a young applicant so maybe it would be beneficial

For Stanford Peer rec (I have 2 work ones):
1. The co-mentor I mentioned
OR
2. Another financial analyst who worked with me on a project for ~1 yr. However, he's 1 year younger than I am...so just 1 year out of college. Not extremely authoritative....I think he'd write a good one but we have a strange (friendly?) relationship so it'd be a favour.
OR
3. Someone from college (i.e. I graduated class of 08) who founded an organization with me in college....he's now a 2nd-yr PhD student. Strange twist is he was my ex-bf...I know this is very, very strange, but I swear I think he'd try to be objective, and we remain friends. He also writes really well and wouldn't disclosed that we used to go out.
OR
4. None of above....

I know no.3 sounds strange, but I'm starting to think that may be the best bet.....

As you can see, really reaching desperation here

I'd be interested to hear what the experts think, but honestly, I don't think having your ex-bf write your peer recommendation is all that strange, if you founded an organization together and genuinely think he's in the best position to evaluate you as a peer. I'd imagine many people get peer recommendations from people they're friends with outside of work.

However, I also don't think that having someone who has only worked with you for a year is such a bad choice either, especially if you're only 2 years out of school. Due to a job change and then a layoff, I'm potentially in this position for my recommendations. I'm not sure what you mean by your "strange" relationship with the other financial analyst, but if he's seen enough of your work to evaluate you, I don't think his age (especially if he's only a year younger than you) really matters for a peer recommendation.

Thanks so much for the additional input - and agree that I'd like to hear what the experts think!

I honestly think (and will tell the exbf) that I'd like him to be honest - the last thing I want to do is to have some sort of risky situation with my recommendations come back to bite me in the behind. It just so happened that if he HADN'T been my exbf I would nearly certainly have considered asking him..and it's weird to think that this changes things.

As for the ex-colleague who I have a "weird" relationship with..only saying that because I transitioned a project on to him, and he would come to me for questions, etc., but I also feel like I had a (playfully) antagonistic relationship with him. E.g. we'd say each other was "bad at their job"...but it was all meant in jest. So overall I think he'd write a good review and has a good opinion of me, but with all the joking around, a little less clear...haha.

dchen -

Try getting in touch with your thesis advisor and having an open conversation with him about "Why an MBA" for you and feel him out about a recommendation.

As for the peer rec - either the exbf or the fellow analyst could work. Take the time to engage with them and really have an in-depth conversation with each to see who you think really could talk about you, your style, etc. I feel like you will feel better about your decision if you take the time to do this step before just asking for a recommendation.

Good luck to you!
Jennifer