GMAT Essays (AWA)

I did this essay on one of the practice exams in a timed manner.Please grade it(on the scale of 0-6)


ESSAY QUESTION:
The following appeared in a corporate memorandum of a beverage manufacturer:

“Our promotional price reductions on energy drinks have been highly successful, as we have seen a dramatic increase in unit sales. Further, surveys of our consumers indicate that this promotion was favorably received by the majority of our customers. Therefore, to improve our company’s profitability and enhance its perception in the eyes of consumers, similar price reductions should be offered on all drinks produced by our firm.”

Discuss how well reasoned you find this argument. Point out flaws in the argument's logic and analyze the argument's underlying assumptions. In addition, evaluate how supporting evidence is used and what evidence might counter the argument's conclusion. You may also discuss what additional evidence could be used to strengthen the argument or what changes would make the argument more logically sound.

YOUR RESPONSE:
There are obvious flaws in author's reasoning of the argument.Author doesnot consider some key issues about the increase in profitability and enhancing company's perception in the eyes of the customers .

Firstly, profitabilty through increased sales will be achieved if and only if there is demand for the products in the market.author doesnt talk anything about the demand.

Secondly, even after reducing the prices , if the prices of the drinks are still higher than those offered by the competitors,there wont be any increase in the sales of the drinks.Thus, the profitability may not increase.

Thirdly,the decrease in prices may not be favourably received by the customers as they may suspect the drinks to have been produced making compromises on the quality.Thus, it may have adverse effects, those of decrease in sales and hurting of the brand image.

Finally, author does not consider the loss of revenue due to reduction in prices of the drinks.If the sales do not increase proportionately to forego the lost revenues and thereafter increase the revenues, there will be losses incurred due to reduction in prices of the drinks.

Due to all the above mentioned points, author's reasoning is seriously flawed.By addressing all these issues, the author can strengthen the argument.

Hello. Well, first of all I am new to this, so my feedback may not be too impressive.

I will just give you feedback in the things i´m sure i can help. Those are two things.

First, you put many times "Author does this" like in the 2nd sentence o immediately anter "Finally". Perhaps you should put "The author".

Second, i think it would be great if you could develop a little bit more the three things you point out. Perhaps putting an example or one alternative to adress the flaw you identified.

Good luck!