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My First Essay for TOEFL exam : Need suggestions ..

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mumba Newbie | Next Rank: 10 Posts Default Avatar
Joined
31 May 2014
Posted:
2 messages

My First Essay for TOEFL exam : Need suggestions ..

Post Sat May 31, 2014 9:12 pm
Topic:Only people who earn a lot of money are successful.

My Response:
Term successful is very vague by itself and can be interpreted in different ways by different people depending upon many factors. Now to say only people with lot money are successful would not be fair. It's like we are taking and circling around only one universal definition of success. If for time being we assume that this is the definition we are having even then it would be courageous to say only money can make you successful.
First success is not mere a state but it is long process of person's development as a whole human being. Along with money so many factors come into play like person's character, behavior, his/her impact on society & peoples’ thought about him/her. So in spite lot money you may not be successful if you fail as a person in your life. I would like to give here example of son of great actor who is consistently failing with his acting skills even though he inherits huge amount of wealth from his father. This underlines the fact that only money cannot make you successful rather you need earn it (success) by yourself.
Mother Theresa was not rich but she did help so many poor, needy people and change their life with her will & sheer passion. Now she was successful in what she did. Here you can see that without lot money you can achieve successfulness by hard work, passion, dedication. Now examples like this are sufficient to make argument weak which say only people with a lot money are successful.
In conclusion we can say that to become successful in life you definitely need money but only money can take you to this destination. Along with that you need work on so many things and that's when you can have a real taste of success.


Thanks in advance. Look forward to hear from you Smile

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