Sentence Correction(700 level)

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Sentence Correction(700 level)

by sarthakailawadi » Sat May 30, 2020 6:09 am
The javelin has a sharp point, which is more obviously dangerous than the discus; moreover, the discus is actually more likely to injure bystanders because, especially when wet, it can slip out of the thrower's hand and fly in a random trajectory.


(A) javelin has a sharp point, which is more obviously dangerous than the discus; moreover,

(B) javelin has a sharp point and is obviously more dangerous than the discus; however,

(C) javelin's sharp point is obviously more dangerous than the discus, even though

(D) javelin's sharp point makes it obviously more dangerous than the discus, even though

(E) javelin, with its sharp point, is more obviously dangerous than the discus; however,

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Re: Sentence Correction(700 level)

by dasAA1 » Tue Jun 09, 2020 3:27 pm
sarthakailawadi wrote:
Sat May 30, 2020 6:09 am
The javelin has a sharp point, which is more obviously dangerous than the discus; moreover, the discus is actually more likely to injure bystanders because, especially when wet, it can slip out of the thrower's hand and fly in a random trajectory.


(A) javelin has a sharp point, which is more obviously dangerous than the discus; moreover,

(B) javelin has a sharp point and is obviously more dangerous than the discus; however,

(C) javelin's sharp point is obviously more dangerous than the discus, even though

(D) javelin's sharp point makes it obviously more dangerous than the discus, even though

(E) javelin, with its sharp point, is more obviously dangerous than the discus; however,
Tough one for me .
E , imo
Meaning :
This sentence says a contrast .
1. The javelin is more obviously dangerous than the discus .
2.But the discus is more likely to injure bystanders because it can slip out of the thrower's hand and fly in a random trajectory.
3. The javelin has a sharp point .

We need to find a choice which can convey the intended contrast and meaning .

(A) javelin has a sharp point, which is more obviously dangerous than the discus; moreover,

Incorrect
1. Which seems to incorrectly refers to sharp point .
2. Usage of a which clause actually shifts the focus of the sentence to 'javelin has a sharp point' . Moreover ..' doesn't convey the intended contrast .


(B) javelin has a sharp point and is obviously more dangerous than the discus; however,

Incorrect
1. Wrong placement of modifier obviously . Distorts the meaning .
2. Meaning wise little bit cloudiness is there in this sentence . Since usgae of 'has a sharp point and is obviously more dangerous ...;however' doesn't show the exact contrast .


(C) javelin's sharp point is obviously more dangerous than the discus, even though

Incorrect
1. Wrong comparison.. javelin's sharp point and the discus . Distorts the meaning .


(D) javelin's sharp point makes it obviously more dangerous than the discus, even though

Incorrect
1. Wrong pronoun 'it'..it has no referent since javelin's is used is possessive .
2. Without the intended contrast it distorts the meaning as well.

(E) javelin, with its sharp point, is more obviously dangerous than the discus; however,
Seems Correct ..
1. 'with its sharp point' is an non-essential modifier . Now the meaning is clear and intended contrast is also clear .