Please rate my Essay

This topic has expert replies

What is the rate?

Poll ended at Fri Jul 04, 2008 5:28 am

6
0
No votes
5
1
100%
4
0
No votes
3
0
No votes
2
0
No votes
1
0
No votes
 
Total votes: 1

Newbie | Next Rank: 10 Posts
Posts: 1
Joined: Fri Nov 30, 2007 3:55 am

Please rate my Essay

by p_yaroslav » Wed Jul 02, 2008 5:28 am
Present your perspective on the issue below, using relevant reasons and/or examples to support your views.

"Our declining environment may bring the people of the world together as no politician, philosopher, or war ever could. Environmental problems are global in scope and respect no nation's boundaries. Therefore, people are faced with the choice of unity and cooperation on the one hand or disunity and a common tragedy on the other."

The argument which describes declining environment is very important both for current quality of life and for the future. As far as environmental problems concern everybody who lives in the earth, everyone has to participate in the problem. The issue of environment is a controversial one. On the one hand, environmental problems are global in scope and unrespectable to boundaries. On the other hand, overall people disunity makes no sense for decision this very problem. Therefore, in my final analysis, I believe that environmental problems are very important for mankind and consequently these problems have to be decided together by uniting peoples and countries.

One reason for my belief is that no one country resolves pollution problems by its own. For example, big Russian factory placed on the river and push trash and toxic solutions into the river. This river as well go down the globe and consequently went to China. If only China people fight against contamination but Russian ones don't the conclusion is clear. China's part of their river will be eventually polluted by toxic materials produced by Russian factory. On the other hand, If Russian will keep environment together with China, every country would be benefited by this union.

Another reason for my belief is that environmental problem much serious than another one such as political issue, war or something else. Everybody knows that when tanker accidence happens all live world and nearest environment perishes very quickly. Fishes can't breathe in case of oil covering water surface and consequently fall by suffocation. Birds, which feed by the sea product fail to up after they touched the oiled water surface. This examples illustrate a big disasters based on only one tanker accident. Politician troubles never waste so huge lives for a short time. Therefore, environmental problem is the most important problem in the earth.

Perhaps the best reason for my belief is catastrophe which happened about 20 years ago in Chernobyl Region, Belorussia. That day became a black day for a lot of people. There was a fire in the nuclear plant. Fire opened the reactors and consequently a lot of radiation emitted throughout the country. Moreover, due to wind and weather condition radiation quickly distributed to nearby regions and countries causing disease and death all around the world. This accidents prove the importance of environmental problems and encourage us keep in mind that peace factory in the past may become unfriendly in the future.

For all these reasons, I therefore believe that environmental problem is the most striking problem for the world. As far as the problem is relatively new everybody should pay lot attention to it. We can't just forget about this problem as far as our lives very depend on the successful resolution environmental troubles. In conclusion I would like to mention that if everyone will not bother the problem there is a chance that humanity wipes out from the earth in the future.

GMAT Instructor
Posts: 1223
Joined: Thu May 01, 2008 3:29 pm
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Thanked: 185 times
Followed by:15 members

by VP_Jim » Thu Jul 24, 2008 6:19 pm
Hi p_yaroslav,

Great job with your use of specific, real-world examples! Every example is very appropriate and supports your point of view nicely. However, I would recommend trying to leave some time before submitting your essay to proofread for grammatical and spelling mistakes; there were quite a few.

I'd probably rate this a 4 or a 4.5. You're on the right track though, good luck!
Jim S. | GMAT Instructor | Veritas Prep