GMAT Essays (AWA)

habashiiii wrote:Hi there: This is my first attempt at the GMAT essay. Please could you grade it. I personally think that I tackle a very broad subject and I should have been more precise to include examples. Anyway, and feedback would be helpful






The following was published by a NGO

Globalization shapes and distorts cultural patterns in developing countries. The Westernization, particularly the Americanization, of culture presents a formidable threat to the cultural integrity of the non-Western World.

Discuss how well reasoned the above argument is.





Globalization has indeed turned our world into a small village due to recent advances in communication, travel and trade. The world as we know it has become smaller and indeed the distance between cultural boundaries shortened. This has led to the question whether some cultures are more overbearing than others, and whether some cultures' integrity will be compromised.

In order to assess the validity of the argument stated in the essay question, one has to determine whether the premise leads to the conclusion. There is a fallacy in the argument because there is a missing premise that would link the first premise to the conclusion. The first premise indicates that cultural patterns in developing countries can be shaped and distorted by globalization, but there is no link in the argument that suggests that these attributes of globalization are a certain threat o the integrity of culture. If there was a premise in the argument explaining this then the argument would be reasonable, but it is found lacking in this case.

In fact, what the argument does state is that globalization changes cultures in developing countries. The premise is indicating one major characteristic of culture; that it is always changing. Cultural patterns are a reflection of a changing society and therefore they need to adapt in order to survive. Therefore, Westernization nor Americanization can never be a threat to the cultural integrity of the non-Western World, it would only enrich it for the better.

Lastly, the argument does not state that Americanization is dominant driving force of globalization. When looking at the argument objectively, one could assume that Americanization is as much a threat to the cultural integrity of Non-western states as would the developing countries be a threat to the cultural integrity of America.

In conclusion, the argument is poorly reasoned due to assumptions inferred but not stated. It would have been an otherwise well reasoned argument if there was a second premise linking globalization to the increased threat of cultural integrity of certain areas of the world.