GMAT Essays (AWA)

Hi!

I'm preparing for my GMAT exam, which will takeplace tomorrow!! I've been studing since last August, but especially hard during the last four month. During this time, I've concentrated my efforts on the quantitative and verbal tests, but not on the AWA. As I'm not English-Speaking I'm not sure of how is it going to be evaluated. Here is and argument and my answer. Please let me know your oppinion:


The following appeared in a memorandum from the head of a human resources department at a major automobile manufacturing company to the company's managers:
“Studies have found that employees of not-for-profit organizations and charities are often more highly motivated than employees of for-profit corporations to perform well at work when their performance is not being monitored or evaluated. Interviews with employees of not-for-profit organizations suggest that the reason for their greater motivation is the belief that their work helps to improve society. Because they believe in the importance of their work, they have personal reasons to perform well, even when no financial reward is present. Thus, if our corporation began donating a significant portion of its profits to humanitarian causes, our employees’ motivation and productivity would increase substantially and our overall profits would increase as well.”
Discuss how well reasoned . . .etc.

-----------------------------ANSWER---------------------------------------------
The author concludes that a for-profit corporation can increase the motivation of its employees by donating part of its profits to human causes. The line of reasoning is that non-for-profit organization’s employees are more motivated than for-profit corporation’s employees because they are helping to improve society.The author concludes that if a for- profit corporation begins to help society, then its employees’ motivation will also increase. The argument is flawed for several reasons.

Firstly, the argument relies upon the questionable assumption that the causes of employees’ motivation are the same in for-profit and non-for-profit organizations. However, the author provides no evidence to demonstrate that this is the case. It could be the case, for instance, that the employees of for-profit corporations were interested in different issues, such as their salaries or their professional career. In that case, even if the for-profit corporation started to donate part of its profit to humanitarian causes, its employees’s motivation would not increase.

Secondly, the writer fails to indicate the features of the interviews mentioned. It is not mentioned whether the employees interviewed are representative of the whole group of non-for-profit employees or whether the conditions of the interviews were accurate and unbiased. Considering, for example, that only three employees were interviewed and that they were quite wealthy (and thus, not really concerned about their salaries) would not support the author’s main conclusion. As no evidence is provided to clarify how were these interviews organized, the supposition indicated seems equally reasonable.

Finally, the author assumes that the only alternative for a company to help society is to donate part of its profits to humanitarian causes. Again, the author fails to consider and analyze other alternatives. For example, the company could develop programs to hire disabled people, or it could organize learning programs or other kind of activities to increase the employees’ motivation.

In conclusion, the argument is unconvincing because it fails to provide evidence to support the assumptions on which it is based. To streghten the argument the author should describe more accurately the studies and interviews mentioned to measure employees’ motivation, in order to demonstrate that these studies are reliable and representative of the whole community of employees. In addition, the author should consider another alternatives to increase employees’ motivation, and analyze their advantages and drawbacks before selecting the most adequate for the company.


Thank you very much!!