Exam in 5 days: Please review this argument essay

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How would you rate this essay?

Poll ended at Sun Aug 03, 2008 2:06 am

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Total votes: 1

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Argument Topic:

"The desire of corporations to maximize profits creates conflict with the general welfare of the nation at large."

My response:

The author is of the opinion that the desire of corporations to maximize profits creates conflict with the general welfare of the nation. The point made by the author might be true in some cases but it does not hold true in all of them. In order to substantiate his rather weak point, the author needs to provide examples of how the desire of corporations to maximize profits would affect the welfare of the nation.

Firstly, in today's world where customer is the king, most of the products are tailor-made for the welfare of the customer. Customers are the citizens of the nation and their welfare is the welfare of the nation. Companies nowadays make huge efforts to please the customer and maximize profits.

Secondly, the author says that the desires of companies to maximize profits are bound to create conflict with the welfare of the nation. This is not always the case. In fact, there are profit-generating organizations which work for the welfare of the nation and are still able to produce record profits. Many private clinics whose main purpose is public health and welfare generate record profits. The same is true of health spas and recreational centers.

Furthermore, the author also needs to provide evidence that companies might not come up with policies for the welfare of the nation. Even a company whose main motive is to generate profits can maximize these profits by focusing on nation's welfare. For e.g. an architectural firm planning to build a shopping mall on the cite of an old age home decided to integrate the old age home in their mall. This gave the firm a huge image makeover and resulted in more profits than they could have achieved by conventional means.

To sum it up, a desire to maximize profits might not always be against the welfare of the nation. In many cases it is indeed in line with nation's welfare and not against it. To strengthen his weak argument, the author needs to focus on corporations who use unfair means that cause harm to the environment and general welfare of the nation.

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by VP_Jim » Thu Jul 31, 2008 2:12 pm
Pretty good job. Try to focus more on the author's reasoning rather than on the issue itself. For example, in your first body paragraph, it sounds like you are saying that you disagree with the argument. The point of the "analysis of an argument" essay is to evaluate the author's reasoning, not the issue itself. Try to focus on the author's faulty assumptions and other errors in logic.

I'll give you a 4.
Jim S. | GMAT Instructor | Veritas Prep