GMAT Essays (AWA)

“Corporations and other businesses should try to eliminate the many ranks and salary grades that classify employees according to their experience and expertise. A ‘flat’ organizational structure is more likely to encourage collegiality and cooperation among employees.”

My essay:

While some might suppose that corporations and other businesses should try to eliminate the many ranks and grades that classify employees in order to encourage collegiality and cooperation among employees, there ares some serious consequences for such a decision that once taken into consideration, would most likely lead to not using this choice. Moreover, there are better ways to achieve this kind of cooperation that do not have such a big downside as the former.

Such a 'flat' organizational structure, like the one offered, is very hard to control. When employees are not part of a hierarchical structure, controlling the actions of every single employee is almost impossible. Another flaw in such a structure is that making decisions is also very hard. In cases in which a dilemma rises, no employee has the authority to decide this way or the other, which could result in endless arguing, when an action in either direction must be made.

Another problem with the flat structure is the lack of ways to compensate good workers. No person working for cooperations with 'flat' organizational structures is likely to have aspirations concerning his promotion, because such a way of compensation would not exist in those cooperations. This could lead to unhappy workers that do not work hard.

In conclusion, collegiality and cooperation among workers should be encouraged in different means, while preserving the hierarchical structure. These means include giving away bonuses for workers who work well in teams, hireling people that are in the first place good cooperators and maintaining a non stressful working environment. The means suggested would lead to more cooperating employees but would not have the big down side as canceling all the ranks and classifications a business has.

You make some good points, but make sure you back them up with specific, real world examples. This will go a long way towards strengthening your argument. Good examples are things such as businesses, countries, and people - aim for one such example per paragraph.

Otherwise, pretty good job. I'll give you a 3 or 4 - could be a 4 or 5 if you included some supporting examples.

VP_Jim, Thank you for reviewing!
It really helped me