GMAT Essays (AWA)

Hello lunfry,

I'll comment on your essay later this afternoon. On the test day, you'll get an unofficial score report as soon as you finish the exam. This report includes scores for the Verbal, Quantitative, and Integrated Reasoning sections, along with the unofficial total score. After 2-3 weeks, you'll have access to your official score report, which includes the AWA grade. Note that the AWA grade does NOT count toward the total score.

I hope this helps!

Hello lunfry,

After reading your earlier essay, I recommended using at least two strong examples and writing a conclusion that felt specific to the prompt, instead of seeming generic. You've done better with the examples in this response.

Writing: Sometimes you'll use both we/us and "one" in the same sentence: "should have provided us...so one could compare" is a good example. Stick to one or we/us, but not both in the same sentence. I didn't find major writing errors. You don't need "for the most part" in your intro. There's more force if you say "the argument has many flaws and is unconvincing."

Structure: Great job with the intro. You quickly summarized the author's argument and stated that it was flawed. Your two body paragraphs had different examples, which is an improvement from the last post. The conclusion still needs work. It's even shorter than the one in your last response (one sentence instead of two), and it still feels completely generic. You need some key words that tie it back to the prompt. Even something as simple as "the argument that the Apogee Company can cut costs is flawed" instead of "the argument is flawed" will help improve the conclusion.

Arguments/Examples: Both your examples were reasonable and well-supposed. I wish you'd shared a specific example in the second body paragraph instead of saying "there are numerous examples," but it's a minor point.

Suggestions for Improvement: Your examples are much better in this response. I still think that you need to improve your conclusion. Try to have one sentence that restates your main point ("the argument that the Apogee Company will cut costs is flawed because..."), and then another sentence emphasizing the main problems ("The author's argument fails to provide statistical evidence for this claim..."). If you have time, a third sentence to wrap up the essay would be good. I'd bump up this essay to the 4-4.5 range. Points were lost for the conclusion.

As for your concerns about lacking time to do an essay template, I don't think that you should worry. The intro and body paragraphs of this response were strong, and only the conclusion needs work. If you really want to build a template, think of the bigger picture first: a clear intro that summarizes the argument, two or three paragraphs with main flaws/examples to strengthen the argument, and a two/three sentence conclusion that reminds the grader of your thesis. You can see a more detailed example in one of our free videos here: https://www.gmatprepnow.com/module/gmat- ... ent?id=771 I'd recommend doing one more response if you have time, and then moving on to other areas of the exam. Once you can write a solid conclusion, I think you'll be in great shape.